It has to get worse before it gets better.
Do you know anybody that has a renovation project in their house that hasn't been completed? It just sits there half-finished, or it's being worked on one little bit at a time. I completely understand why DIY projects don't get completed. When you've done the fun part of tearing everything apart, you're then faced with the reality of the amount of work ahead of you.
Looking ahead at the amount of work it will take to reach the goal can either motivate you or paralyze you.
Last week I helped a friend work on a bathroom renovation. Now, this is his job, he is a contractor. So not completing the job isn't really an option for him if he wants to get paid and not get sued. He had done most of the demolition work before I got on the job with him, sadly, so I got to help wash the floors and put the stalls back in place (it's a public washroom, not some fancy multi-toilet bathroom in a house), and paint the walls a lovely shade of grey. One shade of grey.
I woke up early, I stayed late, I got paint on my pants and have sore muscles now. It's not pretty, but it had to be done if I want to pursue what I'm actually meant to do.
See, there's not much glamour at this point in the journey.
I have no job, no income, our savings account is only going down. So opportunities like this reno-job are necessary to keep up morale.
I'm at home working on my online classes two days a week, listening to a lecture on Powerpoint, or reading chapters upon chapters quietly.
The other days, I'm working on being a professional speaker...only, most of that work is alone, and I'm basically building a business from scratch. It's all in post-demolition stage right now.
This is the time it is easiest to abandon the dream and leave it altogether or to get distracted by other things and work at it painfully slowly. OR it's the time to focus and do what needs to be done right now understanding that each tile is necessary for the renovation to be finished.
There's a renovation going on in my life.
I'm shifting from being a local-church Youth Pastor to something different, maybe not completely different, but a renovated version of myself for sure. This is part of the journey, it's messy, but it's worth it.